your friends who get married after high school
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your friends who get married after high school

we made it through high school thank the
Lord and we kept all of our clothes on even when we got bored I wanna touch
your Butcheek but Jesus said no way wait a minute high
school sweetheart there’s another card to play my friends were getting married
it has always been our dream I made my life’s decision at the age of 17 my
brains been developing for eight or nine more years but I was feeling horny so I
kicked it into gear is the plan look hitched and be happy for a year till I
realize I’ll never see another woman’s rear I’ll bring another lady to the
house we can’t afford but I’ll cry when I get caught and ask forgiveness from
the Lord my friends will start to gossip when
they see us on the town I’ll switch to wearing button-ups and put on 40 pounds
I’ll leave my goals and aspirations high up on a shelf I’ll switch to selling
Herbalife and working on myself I’m not happy
wait I got an idea have a baby I didn’t want have another you’re a jerk have 3 babies we should stop 4 babies I never loved you

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100 thoughts on “your friends who get married after high school

  1. if you or your wife has accidentally gotten married right after high school, follow me on twitter for further assistance @Gusbuckets.

  2. 3 ways statistically proven to make your life generally more successful and happy (with a 99% chance of staying out/leaving poverty):
    1. Graduate high school
    2. Get a job
    3. Don't have children until you are married

    To be more desirable as a potential marriage partner:
    1. Pay off your debt fully (post-k-12 school and non-school, depending on your life choices)
    2. Don't sleep around (emotional baggage, statistically dropping chances to maintain a long-term marriage with each partner, unplanned children, STDs, etc.)

    Logic processing is not fully formulated and complete until 25. 27 and 29 (Women to men) [formerly 25 and 27] is the current average marriage age for adult Americans.
    A woman's fertility peaks in her early and mid-20s after which it starts to decline.
    Men tend to hit their prime peak of success (health, attractiveness, economic) at 35 before declining.
    All common sense, peeps.

  3. Hey, this is unfair. My friend's cousin got married after high school, and he's fine

    I assume. I don't keep in touch with him; he's weird.

  4. A girl in my class was engaged all senior year to her older boyfriend she'd been dating since Freshman year (he was a junior when we were Freshman).
    We weren't friends, so I have no idea how they are doing, but I'd assume not well.

  5. This reminds me of a couple from my high school that got married during winter break of senior year and now are expecting their first kid. (They've only been married for a year)

  6. Ha! Jokes on you. I never had a girlfriend in high school so I never had anybody to get married and I never had any friends so I don't know anybody this stupid making this video incredibly unrelatable! I bet you're feelin real stupid right now, huh gus?

  7. I am quite the opposite of the video.
    Atheist, not even baptize.
    I had nothing serious until the last one.
    Married at 41 after 10 years with her.
    I love her more everyday.
    No children.

  8. It's really scary how accurately you just described at least 3 couples that I know. Or used to know before they had 5 babies by the age of 25 and decided they didn't want to have their own lives anymore.

  9. How did you manage to describe all of my old classmates in 2 videos

    (The other one is your Christian friends on Facebook)

  10. It's sad reading all these comments and its so fucking common. It shouldn't be that way and it shows that some many people are stupid.

  11. I would love to share this on my facebook page because there’s 3 couples in my year that are all getting married, they’ll say im jeeeaaaalous, I’m 20… what the fuck… that’s not happening for ages.

  12. I think the greatest thing about this is that Gus had to go through checkout with 6 pregnancy tests while keeping a straight face

  13. Gus I want you to know this was exactly my parents. They made it to baby #4 (me) and couldnt do it any more

  14. Alternatively
    Fuck religion, have sex as you like, dont get married, and acknowledge that monogamy isn't normal for humans shrugs

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