– Hello there Mr Riley.
– Hello, you alright, yeah, yeah.
– My name’s Dr. Beddi… – Right.
– and I’m the…
– Right. – …psychiatrist. – Right I come and see you cause my GP sent me to see you didn’t he? – Yeah, yeah.
– He said come and see a trick cyclist cos then you’ll be alright. – Come and see a…?
– A trick cyclist…a psychiatrist, yeah.
– Oh right, ok. – Yeah you must know that one.
– He said come and see you cause you have time to listen to me.
– Yeah. – He’s not had time to listen to me you see…
– …cause he’s a GP, he’s a doctor… – Right.
– …but I don’t think he’s very clever. – Can I just…
– He’s not very clever cause he’s not,
he’s not, he’s not… – Ok.
– …get, get, getting to this you see, he won’t let me talk about this. – Right, ok, well…
– He sort of listens to it sometime but then sometimes he doesn’t. – Right. Can I just clarify why you are here
and why I’m here, I’m the psychiatrist… – Well I’ve come to see you.
– …in the emergency clinic today… – Right okay.
– …and your GP has asked me to see you. – Right so that’s why I’m here.
– Is that right?
– Yeah cos I got to tell you about this. – Ok, ok.
– And this cos there’s important stuff in
there – Ok.
– really really important stuff…
– Ok, well before we start with that… – …come to see you
– …can I just ask you what would you would… – Yeah, yeah.
– …like me to call you Mr Riley?
– What names? – Yeah.
– Name names a game, I don’t bother with names that’s just too good…
– Right, ok.
– …call me John. – John.
– Yeah ok, what’s your name? – I’m Dr Beddi John.
– No you’re proper name?
– My name is Dr… – No you’re proper name, your proper name
is not doctor. – At work I am Dr Beddi…
– You’re not doctor, Doctor Who, Doctor Who, diddly dang, woddly dang. – [Laughter from John]
It’s good that innit, do you watch that it’s fantastic that programme? – Ok.
– Now what is…
– John…can I ask you how old are you John? – How old, I, oh don’t, you’re only as old
as the woman you feel aren’t you aye? [Laughter from John]
– Right ok. – You know the way to a man’s heart is
through is stomach ooh yeah fantastic. – Right ok, so how old would that make you
John? – Food for the soul, a nice bit of sole, yeah, aye… – Right.
– a bit of fish, ah fantast, I aint half hungry.
– Right. – You got any food? Any food round here? Oi
down, there you got any food, I’m starving nah? – They won’t be able to get you any food, lets…
– Nah, oh, aww. – Shall we perhaps, I tell you what…
– Ok, now let’s get back to this, this is important.
– Yes that’s a good idea, yep ok. – This is why I’m here to talk to you about
this… – Right ok.
– …to tell you what’s going on. – Ok tell me a bit about this then.
– Well this is, this is the work I’ve been doing… – Right.
– …and it’s really important and it’s
my cure for cancer. – Ok.
– That’s what it is you know, it’s all written down here… – Right.
– …well it’s not written down it’s here and it’s at home, in my books at home.
– Right. – What I get from the papers I get is, I get
sort of clues… – Right.
– …as to what I’m supposed to do and how I’m supposed to get the other clues to hone
it down… – Ok.
– …and come up with a final thing. – And how long has all of this been going
on would you say? – It’s been for ages now.
– How long would you say? – Absolutely ages now. – Well I’ve been up all week mostly.
– About a week? – Well this week I’ve been working really
hard at it. – Because before…
– It’s been going on longer than a week…
– Right. – …but I’ve been working really hard on
it for this week… – Because you normally have another…
– …it’s the numbers you see… – Right.
– It’s the numbers you have to find out. – Am I right in thinking you normally do a
different job? – Yeah I’m a mechanic.
– You’re a mechanic.
– a car mechanic yeah. – Ok.
– Manic, Manic Mechanic they call me. – Manic Mechanic?
– Yeah it was my mate…
– Who calls you that? – My mate Dave, I bought, I show him this
and he told me to go away cos I was bonkers… – He said you were bonkers?
– …in fact he didn’t say go away he told me to fuck off. [John laughs] – My goodness ok, ok.
– He did, he said “Fuck off, you’re bonkers.”
– Did he? – Anyway…
– …so he did that. And er, so I said yeah I didn’t think he was clever enough really.
– Right. – You know not..and well I went to see the
doctor about it. – Ok.
– Cos I thought I’d show him cos he’s a Doctor, you know he’s been to University, he’s done stuff…
– Yeah. – …nah thick as shit. He didn’t, he said
he didn’t have time… – Right.
– …I thought how can you not have time to hear about the cure for cancer…
– Right. – …y’know what I mean, yeah, yeah?
– Ok. – So that’s why he sent me here to see you
to tell you all about it. – Right, ok, tell me about it, tell me what’s
going on. – Ok, right well it’s, I’ve got my various
bits and pieces here I find in the papers like y’know the football results…
– Right. – …they need adding together….
– Ok. – …and then I have to find some other information
on this page. There’s some pages and page numbers there…
– …add those together and take it away from what’s on there.
– Right. – So, so, I do that and you find you find
other things. – And then what does that number do then?
– That number corresponds to numbers I’ve got on my, on my chart at home. I’ve got
a big chart on my wall… – Right.
– …and I find that number
– Ok. – …and that adds up to something else.
– Uhuh. – It’s, it’s, it’s all there, I mean that’s,
that’s, that’s really good, I’m gonna get one of those. – What’s that?
– That’s, that’s really good, that’s, that’s a phone, it does the internet…
– Right. – …and everything…
– …so I’ll be able to find out more stuff… – Right.
– …you know, that way, when I’m out and about.
– And, and… – So there’s numbers you see, I’ll use
those numbers there… – Right.
– …y’know they’ll need adding up… – Ok.
– …and taking away from something else. – And John, when you’ve done all this with
all the numbers… – Yeah.
– …and the chart…
– Yeah. – …where will that leave you? What is it
you’re headed for? – Well, it’s the cure for cancer innit,
that’s what it is. – The cure for cancer? – The cure for cancer, yeah.
– Ok, so how’s that going to work then? – Well, how it works is God tells me you
know, that er, I’m doing a really good job… – Right.
– …and how great I am and how fantastic it is I’m working at this you know…
– Ok. – …and I just keep going at it…
– Ok. – …you know I don’t stop, I don;t stop. – Ok, can I just take you back a step…
– Yeah sure. – …because you said God tells you… – God tells me, go on.
– …can you tell me a bit more about that? – Well he, he, he tells me, he just talks
to me, yeah. – He talks to you?
– Yes, he talks to me… – Ok, alright.
– …and tells me
– Right. – I’m doing a really good job…
– …and I’m fantastic… – So God talks…
– …and I’m really wonderful…
– Uhuh. – …and I’m great, you know I’m doing… – Ok, and when God talks…
– …and I have to show this to people…
– Right. – And that’s why I’ve come here to show you.
– And John, when God talks to you…
– Yeah. – …can I just clarify this with you.
– What? – Does he talk to you like I’m talking to
you, with the voice coming through your ears or does it feel more like… – Voice doesn’t come through your ears
it comes out of your mouth, voice comes out of your mouth and goes in your ears.
– That’s right. – Yeah I get…you should know that cos
you know you’re a doctor as well aren’t you. – Yeah.
– So you should know these things, yeah. – And is that how the voice seems to you John? – I hear him in my ears…
– You hear him in your ears? – …because that’s what I’m used to hearing… – Right, Ok.
– …and he talks to me with his mouth cos he’s, he’s…
– So the voice that seems to come through your ears rather than from inside your head?
– It’s quite loud cause he’s a big bloke… – He’s a big, is he a big bloke? – …he’s a big bloke yeah, yeah and he’s
got a big beard. – What’s he like then?
– Well he’s a big bloke with a big beard, yeah. – Right.
– I called him? Beardy Beardy once he didn’t like that he got a right hump…
– Right, ok. – …Christ he, I called him Beardy Beardy.
– Yeah I can imagine. – Yeah cos I just…
– And what kind of…
– …so I, I, I just call him Sir. – You call him Sir?
– He likes to be called Sir yeah. – Ok, and what kind of things, when he’s
talking to you, what kind of things does he say to you John?
– He tells me I’m fantastic…
– Right, ok. – …you know, how great I am for doing this…
– Uhuh. – …and getting stuck into this and keeping
at it and that I should show it to people. – Right, ok.
– And that’s what, that’s what I do, I come out and I show it to people. There’s some
stuff… – So who have you been showing it to? – Well, ok, who have I been showing? I’ve
erm, I’ve sent copies of stuff to the Pope… – Right.
– …and the Archbishop of Canterbury, none of them have written back, you’d think they
would you know… – So no replies yet?
– …cos they’re close to God, they probably know him. – Right, ok.
– They probably met him and stuff.
– Yeah. – Well I mean the Pope, he claims to have
met him… – Right.
– …I mean you don’t know…- Yeah. – …I would assume the Pope knows God…
– Right. – …he knows, he’s got his address, his telephone
number, everything like that. – Right.
– But then you know, er, see the Archbishop of Canterbury, I think he’s just rude, cos
he’s not written back at all. – Right. – And there’s Tony Blair.
– So you’ve written to Tony Blair as well? – Yeah, yeah, he’s a right wanker,you
see he didn’t… – Ok and what did he say?
– What did Tony say? – Nothing, nothing, I got a letter back,
well I didn’t even get a letter back from him, I got it back from somebody else.
– Right. – Not him… – Ok.
– …could’ve got lost in the post and somebody could have got it by mistake but…
– Ok, so… – …just hoping nobody has stolen my ideas
really… – Ok, it sounds John as though…
– …cos that’s what it is. – Sorry to interrupt.
– It’s ok. – It sounds John as though this has all been
keeping you really busy. – Really busy, really busy
– Have you been sleeping at all? – No I aint had time to sleep nah… – No time to sleep?
– …nah, nah, nah – When was the last time you had a good
night’s sleep would you say? – Pfft. Don’t need it.
– Don’t need it? – Don’t need it, I got all this enthusiasm
from God… – Right…
– .. you know…
– …so what’s your… – …it’s there it’s the energy inside me,
it’s there to make me do work. – So you feel as if you’ve got a lot of
energy? – Yeah, tons of it, tons of it.
– And how are your thoughts, are they going fast? Are they, are you thinking lots? Lots
of ideas? – Well yeah you have to think very intensely,
you look at stuff down here, there’s, there’s, I got that in the door the other day, you
know… – Ok.
– …there’s lots of numbers on there that need adding up and taking away. – And John how are you feeling about yourself?
Your self-esteem, how do you feel about yourself as a person at the moment? – Fantastic.
– You feel fantastic? – I feel fantastic, you know cos God’s telling
me… – Right.
– …I am yeah…
– Ok. – …and that I’m doing a really really
good job… – Yeah.
– …and it’s all there and it’s all happening. – And tell me this John, because I couldn’t
get it from your GP letter, have you ever had anything like this before in your life?
Where you have felt full of energy and lots of bright ideas?
– No, nah.
– It’s not happened before… – Nah, but this has been going on for so long
that I can’t really remember anything else you know. – And have there ever been any times in
your life where you’ve kinda been the opposite John? – Where you’ve been a bit down in the dumps,
not much energy? – No, nah, nothing like that.
– Nothing like that? – No, nothing like that no. – Ok, and what about any family history, does
anyone in your family have things like this? – No, no it’s just me its really, well they’re
not really that clever you know. – Who’s not that clever?
– My family. – Your family?
– You know, that’s why I have to come see doctors, places, hospitals and things like
that because they have clever people, you’re a clever person… – Right, so do you feel as if you’re more clever than perhaps other people? – Well, well, well yeah.
– Right. – You know I’m certainly more clever than
those people at work… – Ok.
– …you know cos they’re a bit thick. – And John, I guess I’m wondering what
might have happened to start all this off for you, have you any thoughts yourself what’s
brought this on? – Well, well God. Yeah.
– God, yeah, yeah. – Ok.
– And he just came to me one day…
– Right. – …one day he just came to me you know…
– Ok. – …and I started noticing connections with
numbers and things. – Right, yeah, I wonder…
– It’s, it’s, it’s all there you’ve just got to find it.
– Ok, I wonder John… – You’ve got to dig deep and look for it
you know what I mean, yeah yeah? – Right, ok. How have you been feeling physically
in your physical health? Any problems there? – Physically, fine, I’m, I’m, I’m fine
yeah, absolutely. – And have you been taking any prescribed
medication… – No, no, no, nothing like that… – …any drugs that aren’t prescribed, any
substances. – I just need everything that’s within me
now, I don’t need anything else. – And you know how you were saying that your
mate at work… – Yeah.
– …said that you were…
– Who Dave? – Yeah.
– Yeah he said rude things…
– He said rude things… – …and I don’t like repeating it…
– …he kind of suggested you might be…
– I told you what he said didn’t I… – Yeah you did, you did.
– …he used the F word and I don’t like that.
– No, no. – No.
– It sounded like he thought you weren’t very well at the moment. – No I’m fine.
– What do you think to that because?
– Now look can we look at this now, cause this is what I want to talk about?
– Right. – It’s just that I’ve come here to talk
about this and you seem to be going off on one for some reason… – Yeah.
– …and you’re not really paying attention
to me. – Yeah I guess what it…
– Do you want to do that now, can we talk a bit more about this now? – Well I guess before we get back into that
I guess what… – Well no I don’t want to get back in,
I want to talk about it now, can we talk about it now please? – I guess John what I’m wondering is whether t his might be a sign that you’re not very well at the moment? – No I’m fine I want to talk about this,
you seem to want to change the subject… – Yeah. – …so I don’t want to talk to you anymore.
I’ve had enough of you and I’ve had enough of being here. I want to talk to somebody
else, I want to talk to the boss. I want to talk to your boss…
– Right. – …where’s your boss?
– John, I am the boss, I’m a consultant… – Well you’re a shit boss and I want to
talk to somebody else, there must be somebody else I can talk to?
– There isn’t John.
– I want to talk to the headman, I’m fed up with talking to the oily rag, I want to talk
to the engineer, no more monkeys. The organ grinder for me, I want to talk to the top
man, top boss, top cat, that’s who I want to talk to. Top cat, top cat, top cat, yeah, ohh, ee, doo, lup, dup, ah.